We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Randomize
