We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
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