Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Randomize
