so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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