I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
