I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
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