I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Randomize