Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize