she was so not down for the gang bang
Jerry, you need to find god
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize
