Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
Randomize
