After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
I see more hoeing in ur future
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
Randomize
