Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Randomize
