Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
