so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
