I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
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