Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
Randomize
