i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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