I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
I am full of burrito and curiosity
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
