a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Randomize
