dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
Randomize
