You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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