how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
wow bdsm is so cute
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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