They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Randomize
