she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
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