U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
He felt like a one man threesome
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
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