tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
I'm both gender and math confused
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
