I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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