I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize