i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
Sorry my hands just texted you
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize