So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
