glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Randomize
