that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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