I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize