I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
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