If that was your dad, he is hot
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
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