yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
