So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
You are a genius and a whore.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
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