so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
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