So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
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