every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
i think i have herpe
just one?
where does the pee come out of this thing
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Randomize
