the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Randomize
