waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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