absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Are my feet made of real feet?
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
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