the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
