How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Randomize
