whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
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