after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Randomize