who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize