Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
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