Just fell off a train. Bad.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
honey bunches of taint.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
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